Must he? Must he? Tensions are running high amongst the Blacks and Asians in Oakland. This is apparent from the get-go as Po Sing (played by Jonkit Lee) is enjoying himself with three of his Asian lovelies at an all black nightclub. Here we are treated to the only breast we will see in the entire movie. Sigh. Quite the bold move, waltzing into your enemies nightclub – that is unless you are well versed in the art of Kung Fu! The fight is on, and it's made all the better because everyone in the damn club knows Kung Fu! This is obviously a mandatory skill if you live in this dangerous city. Check out the brother with the Mod Squad afro. Awesome! There's lots of glass to be broken in this club, and they break every piece of it in the process. Once the last shard is shattered, the club owner appears to break it all up with a few machine guns. Smart move, because everyone in this club is packing.

Poor Po gets out of the bar with his life, but he doesn't last for long. He's found the very next day hanging from a lamppost. His brother, Han Sing (Jet Li), learns of his brother's death while rotting away in a prison in Hong Kong. Check out the No Talking sign written in English in the cafeteria. Nice work there! He must escape to avenge his brother's death. What might be the best way for him to do that? I know, start a fight with the guards. This will cause all of the other guards to enter in riot gear and beat him to a bloody pulp. Say, that didn't seem to work out too well. Never fear, that's only the first step. Next the guards will drag him into a locked cell. From there they will hoist him up on a chain by one leg. Aha! Now he's got them right where he wants them! This is the preferred way to defeat four guards while in prison in Hong Kong! Ridiculous? Yes, but I went along for the ride. It was darn entertaining.

As was the whole film. Han returns to the States and uncovers a plot to shake people down for their waterfront properties so as to build a new football stadium in order to lure the Raiders back to the city. Oh why, why didn't they get Al Davis to make a cameo appearance in this movie? He would've been the best villain ever! We eventually learn that Han's father is part of this plan, as is the leader of the black mob, Isaak O'Day, played by Delroy Lindo. We've been Beaned! Of course, his daughter Trish, played by Aaliyah, wants no part of her father's business. There's supposed to be some kind of Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story thing going on here, but I just don't buy it. There's not a hint of a romantic spark between Han and Trish. They come off more like Brother and Sister. Okay, perhaps First Cousins.

But who cares. All of this is just an excuse for some very imaginative fight sequences. The only time they go wrong is when they get all Matrix on us. The special effects were not needed and only call attention to themselves. And the acting is surprisingly above average. My only complaint is that having teased us so early on, we have no follow up breastisies. I guess they had no time with all of that killing going on. 34 confirmed kills. Say, perhaps this kind of thing could provide a good drinking game; Romeo Must Drink.

Hamlin Grade: 6.5

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